This post is proudly brought to you in part from our sponsors: TV On The Radio, Neko Case, Ghost Face Killah, All Is Love, Def Squad, C.R.S., Shearwater, Little Beaver, Tokyo Police Club, Scat Man John, Clinic, Of Montreal, Hot Chip, Grand Archives, Wilco, The Dream, Heart, Wu Tang Clan, Richard Hawley, P.J. Harvey, Feist, Dr. Dog, Mogwai, Walk Men, Eels, and Apples In Stereo.

Full disclosure: I have never seen the following films: W., Juno, Observe And Report, The Good German, Role Models, Super Bad, Friday Night Lights, The King Of Kong: A Fistful Of Quarters, Friday Night Lights, Fatal Attraction, South Land Tales, Burn After Reading, Reno 911: Miami, Tropic Thunder, There Will Be Blood, and Synecdoche, New York. And I only got half way through “Knocked Up” and “No Country For Old Men.”

I say that only because whenever I admit that at a party, everyone gets mad at me or doesn’t believe me or accuses me of being a bad person or starts yelling or whatever. Yes, yes, yes. I’m sure all of these films are amazing and I will love them and they are all definitely on my seemingly never-ending To Do List.  But I haven’t yet found the time to get around to it. I’ve been really busy lately. So sue me already.

Scientology: Still way worse than the Necronomicon and Communism combined.

A. The Seinfeld Non-Reunion Reunion On Curb Your Enthusiasm Was Too Meta For My Tastes

Post-post-post irony is a dead scene. Get over yourselves already.

B. Kill Face Is Not Consistently Funny, But He Definitely Has His Occasional Sparks Of Brilliance

Kill Face is a character from the Adult Swim show “Frisky Dingo.” In general, I have stopped defending Adult Swim’s programming to skeptics who deride it for trying too hard, immature, regurgitating tired pop culture references, too much “anime action,” etc. Because, frankly, sometimes that’s the truth. I have officially gave up on “Family Guy,” a once great show who’s own down-slide eerily mirrors the squandered fortunes of it’s chief partner in crime. That said, Kill Face’s bizarre non-sequiturs give me hope for the future.

C.  Mormons Should Watch “Big Love” Or At The Very Least Give It A Honest Try With An Open Mind

The thing that fascinates me about this polygamy drama is how surprisingly sympathetic it made me feel towards the LDS community. Because I couldn’t agree with them any less on any conceivable theological level. Also, for the first time the Brigham Young/John Smith set seem sexy. It strangely never occurred to me before that in order to produce such famously large families, everyone would have to become a borderline nymphomaniac.

D.  BBC’s “Missing Top Model” Is Probably Must See Appointment Television For Amputee Fetishists

Acrotomophilia. Body integrity identity disorder. Nuggets. Body dysmorphic disorder. Paraphilia. Whatever you want to call it: this televised  contest is essentially crossing Naomi Campbell with “Boxing Helena.”  Maybe no one else thought about the potential ramifications. Or perhaps some truly cynical souls are banking on it.

E. The Geico Caveman TV Program: Best. Show. About. Racism. Ever.

Who would have thought that a concept based on a series of forgettable insurance company commercials would be able to say more honest things about current U.S. race relations than anyone else has in years?  Perhaps that was the point after all. Just like how no one expects or notices when horror films take on weighty topics like bio-terrorism or consumerism or whatever.

F. NBC’s Ben Silverman Has The Creepiest, Most Annoying Laugh Of All Time

Three cheers for Craig Ferguson!

G. “Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip” Was Just As Good As “30 Rock” In It’s Own Unique Way

Aaron Sorkin has a lot to answer for. Being a crackhead, for example. And he’s no Larry Sanders. It wasn’t funny but neither was “The West Wing” and “Sports Night.” That’s not the point. Admit it: Liz Lemon (Tina Fey’s character on “30 Rock”) is now more or less a live action version of the “Cathy” comic strip. “Studio 60” was a dramedy in the best possible sense of the word.

H. Adam Samberg Makes Me Laugh Sometimes And I Refuse To Apologize If And When It Happens.

"You telling me the man who try to put a rubber fist in my anus was a homosexual?"

“Dick In A Box” made me laugh. So did “Iran So Far.” That does not mean I’m stupid or sexist or homophobic or racist or whatever. Settle down. Even if Lonely Island or Sacha Baron Cohen isn’t “my kind of comedy” necessarily, I’m not going to outright dismiss it without even giving it a chance. Adam Samberg is definitely not “my people” but I am not going to pretend I didn’t think it was funny so everyone will think I’m cool. Shut up and stop pretending you’re not jealous when a rival succeeds more than yourself.

I. “Extras” Is Not Just Funny In Theory. Stop Smirking And Give It Another Chance. It Still Works.

David Bowie in a pub. The racist test. Arguing about time zones. Ian McKellan’s “Wizard! You shall not pass!” Ben Stiller the director. Every time I think I can predict what Ricky Gervais is going to say, he surprises me again. Amazing!

J. “I Love New York” Provides Irrefutable Proof That America Is In Fact The Great Satan. Who Knew?

If this is “reality,” then God help us all. As if “Flavor of Love” was too sophisticated for some discerning viewers. New York is proof that we as a collective whole deserve another terrorist attack if for nothing else than to thin out the herd a little bit for the good of mankind in general.

K. Nobody Should Ever Make Another Broadway Musical Ever Again For Any Reason Whatsoever.

Granted, Bob Dylan is a musician and “High Fidelity” is a book and movie about music. But the corresponding musicals they produced in supposed “tribute” to them provide irrefutable proof that Broadway deserves to die. Boo frikkin’ hoo.

L. “Pants Off Dance Off” Is The Future. In Other Words, There Is No Future.

I feel so dirty now. I will never be clean again, no matter how many showers I take. My soul hurts, my brain aches.

M. David Letterman Is Just As Hypocritical As Bill O’Reilly, Which Is Really Saying Something.

It is indeed true that Letterman seriously pwnd O’Reilly and that is in of itself admirable. Bill is full of crap and needs to be called on it every day for the rest of his life. The pirate costumes, the Who’s “Won’t Get Fooled Again;” I loved all of it, adored the whole thing start to finish. And Letterman’s writers had hands down some of the best jokes during the Culture Warrior’s Loofah-Gate Scandal. That said, I found Dave’s apologies for his own employee indiscretions to be contrite at best, oblivious at worst. It reminded me of a petulant 13-year-old who’s mad he got caught rather than sorry for having done something wrong. It wasn’t just adultery, it was an indirect abuse of power. Not on the same level as Bill’s harassment of course but he clouded the issue by focusing on the blackmailer and black mailing rather than, um, you know, the moral vulnerability/weakening that allowed him to get blackmailed in the first place. The easiest way out of adultery is to not get married in the first place. You can’t have a sex scandal if you’re single. But you can’t have it both ways: you have children now and you are a jerk for putting them and your wife through the wringer for something that wasn’t their fault. Oh yeah, by the way, Ferguson is funnier than you and has been for several years. So there.

N. Seriously, Why Can’t Everyone Just Leave Stephen A. Smith The Hell Alone? What’s Your Damage?

Hecklers are the lowest life form on the planet. Patent trolls deserve to live more than hecklers. Regardless of whether you disagree with him about the Kobe Bryant scandal or are annoyed with his delivery or like Dick Vitale better or whatever, what did he do to you personally? Let the man do his job. WTH?!?

Playing Catch Up Mix Tape Official Track Listing

1. Def Squad – Full Cooperation

2. TV On The Radio – Golden Age

3. CRS – Us Placers

4. Shearwater – Rooks

5. Ghost Face Killah – The Barrel Brothers

6. Little Beaver – Party Down

7. Love Is All – Wishing Well

8. Neko Case – People Got A Lotta Nerve

9. Tokyo Police Club – Your English Is Good

10. Scatman John – Scatman

11. Clinic – Children Of Kellogg

12. Of Montreal – Suffer For Fashion

13. Hot Chip – Ready For The Floor

14. Grand Archives – Sleepdriving

15. Wilco – You And I

16. The Dream – Walkin’ On The Moon

17. Heart – Magic Man

18. Wu Tang Clan – The Heart Gently Weeps

19. Richard Hawley – Just Like The Rain

20. P.J. Harvey – When Under Ether

21. Feist – My Moon, My Man

22. Dr. Dog – The Ark

23. Mogwai – Batcat

24. Walk Men – In The New Year

25. Eels – Trouble With Dreams

26. Apples In Stereo – Energy

Eskimo-in-igloo thermal with Ugg's in public: 1 Rachel Bilson: -10

P.S.

Recommended Daily Allowance Of Awesome Sauce: (DVDS) The Lives Of Others, The Wind That Shakes The Barley, Sugar, City Of Men, Lemming, Pan’s Labyrinth. (Documentaries) I Am An Animal, God Grew Tired Of Us, My Kid Could Paint That, Nimrod Nation, Where In The World Is Osama Bin Laden?, When The Levees Broke, At The Death House Door, The Black List, Religulous.

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